In today’s generation, we as parents want to fulfil each and every demand of our children in order to make them feel that they don’t lack anything. But while doing so, we forget to teach them that there is also discipline and rules which are also equally important. The following article is also about to stop overindulging your child as well as overindulged child syndrome, consequences of overindulgence, overindulgent parents, signs you are overindulging your child and overindulgent parenting style.
Stop overindulging your child – The basics!
Parenting style of every parent differs from one another. While mainly considering some of there, the following are some of the styles of parenting such as authoritative, nurturing, neglectful, overcritical, and supportive. But while considering today’s busy life, hectic schedule with increasing social pressure and high standard of living, the “Over-Indulgent” style of parenting is in trend. Overindulgent parenting style is also called “over-permissive” or “over-nurturing” parenting.
Overindulgent parenting style is considered when the child is provided whatever he or she wishes to have in just one time of asking and by doing this parent forget to teach them discipline and a habit of accepting no as an answer. This is considered as overindulged child syndrome. This intention is may be shown or performed out of love as all the parents always try to fulfil their child’s need and wish that they don’t lack anything.
Overindulged child syndrome basically has the following three characteristics:
- Providing too much: Overindulged child syndrome includes providing everything in access, whether it is about their toys or playtime or activities.
- Over-nurturing: When parents take over the activities which are supposed to be done by the children themselves. For e.g. the household chores which are easy and can be done by the child themselves, packing their school bag, etc.
- Soft structure: When parents are having this overindulged child syndrome, they tend to have a soft corner for the children.
They aren’t able to teach the child proper discipline. They usually face difficulty in assigning the child their responsibility and also not able to enforce the rules they wish their child should follow. This may include habits such as not working at home, deciding their own bedtime or showing unnecessary tantrums to everyone.
In the beginning, the parent may feel that they are fulfilling the wishes of their child but in the long term, it results in a pattern of overindulging and over-nurturing. The initial years of a child’s life are years where they can develop their personality and can also be considered as the important formative years of their lives. These are years where the child learns about the outer world, out themselves, their surroundings, their families and the way to communicate to them, the way to express himself and many more things. Since parents were there with the child from the beginning, the child’s behaviour is highly influenced by the way the parents treat the child.
In this regard then, there are chances that some of the parents may have to suffer from the consequences of overindulgence. Overindulgent parenting style isn’t harmful to anyone, but one has to face the consequences of overindulgence in the long run. Overindulgent parenting style doesn’t help in the healthy emotional growth of the child.
An overindulgent parent knows that in a long run they have to face the consequences of overindulgence in their lives. It may be possible that you feel unpleasant living with your overindulged child or may be that you feel that they should at least take responsibility for their own work. The consequences of overindulgence may include child facing trouble with the following:
- Patience: the child may not how to wait for the things they want (delayed gratification).
- Seeking attention: overindulgent parents make a habit for their child to constantly be a centre of attraction. Hence, the child expects the outer world to do the same.
The major consequences of overindulgence are that the child isn’t taking proper care of themselves, not taking up the responsibility of their own work or themselves, and knowing what is enough.
Following are some of the signs you are overindulging your child. You must consider them and are suggested to stop overindulging your child in order to save yourself and the child from the consequences of overindulgence.
Not teaching the child the life skills
This is one of the major signs you are overindulging your child as you are just trying to make their lives as comfortable as possible. This will not teach them the value of anything in their life. As a result of which the child may fail to learn the life lessons, he is supposed to learn by falling down and getting up every time until he gets success. Some of the things that parents do, which they should not in order to stop overindulging your child:
- Not giving the responsibility of anything to the child.
- Denying for giving enough independence to the child to perform on their own.
- Not letting the child move out of their comfort zone and come out and explore new things.
Providing things that are not required
In order to stop overindulging your child, one must consider this signs you are overindulging your child. Out of love, the parents tend to give the child so many things and varieties of them which may not be required in the age group the child is in. For example, many parents provide their kids the smartphones and laptops which are totally not required by the child as he isn’t in the age group which needs that thing. This will only bind the child with their phone and this will reduce his interaction with the outer world as he will be stuck to his phone.
Bribing the child
The child who is pampered all his life is suddenly expected to behave in proper discipline and follow the rules. This isn’t possible in real life. The parents need to understand that they have to stop overindulging your child at a very early stage to make them understand the need for discipline and rules in their lives. The child is already overindulged and not understanding the value of taking up the responsibility, many parents try to bribe them. Parents may offer them a reward in exchange for everything they want their child to do. This is a very crucial sign you are overindulging your child. To avoid this situation you must stop overindulging your child in the very beginning.
Overindulgent parents and spoilt brats go hand-in-hand. The more the parents overindulge their child’s life, the more the spoilt the children are. This is because the child knows that their every demand is going to be fulfilled no matter what. If you want your child to grow up as a responsible and disciplined person, you have to stop overindulging your child. The need of the child is the love, care, and the warmth and not these materialistic things. So you as a parent need to understand that you have to stop overindulging your child.
“Enjoy your path to mom, Relish every moment”
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